How to make a difficult decision
Four strategies for navigating challenging situations
Last week I announced to our school community that I accepted a new position as a systems coach with a regional education agency.
As much as I don’t want to see it this way, saying yes to a new position also means saying no to the one I am leaving. I’ve devoted seven years as principal of a terrific school. Why leave now? How will others view my departure?
Regardless of our reasons for moving in one direction or another, I have learned the following four strategies can be helpful when making a big decision. Maybe you will find these actions useful in your life too.
Assess and accept current reality.
A main reason that I shared with others for leaving is our school is in a good place.
We have found agreement around 17 shared literacy beliefs as a faculty.
These beliefs have been consistently demonstrated in teacher practice, observed by me through a framework during instructional walks.
Our shared beliefs and aligned instructional framework guided the selection of a core literacy resource we now utilize schoolwide.
I am confident that our school culture, guided by our teacher leaders, will sustain.
Also, I am no longer trying to facilitate significant change. We are at a “tinkering” stage: keeping expectations high while innovating at the edges.
I know myself well enough to know that I’m not a tinkerer. I like projects. This reality informed my decision. After seven years as principal, it would be a nice opportunity for new leadership to step into the position.
Question for you: What is your current reality, and is it allowing you to operate within your strengths and interests?
Know what to say “yes” to.
I have sometimes said yes to an opportunity because on the surface it looked interesting. But I also had not clarified what specific, limited interests I wanted to pursue at the time. How does an opportunity align with where I want to be and to go?
“We are kept from our goal not by obstacles but by a clear path to a lesser goal.”
― Robert Brault
Where I was sixteen years ago, when I first started as a principal, is not where I am now. I’m interested in supporting teachers and leaders schoolwide in their own work toward success.
Question for you: What are your values, and are you able to enact these values in your current context?
Use mental models and decision-making protocols.
Models and protocols provide a structure for thinking about challenges that have no simple answers. You probably won’t arrive at a clear answer either way, but using structured reflection and analysis can help gain new insights into the challenge itself.
A favorite resource I recently discovered is The Decision Book: 50 Models for Strategic Thinking by Mikael Krogerus and Roman Tschäppeler.
The one tool I used for my career decision is called “The Rubber Band Model”. Basically you respond to two questions:
What’s holding you back?
What’s pulling you forward?
This is an alternative to a pros/cons list (which I have never found helpful).
Going through this process, I realized that one thing holding me back was a sense of comfort in my current role. This is a good thing for the school - a sign of a more self-directed culture - as well as an indicator that something new might be needed for me.
Question for you: What initial theories do you have about the forces currently holding and pulling you?
Keep the explanation for the decision brief.
Once the decision is made, it’s done. It is no longer necessary to rationalize it.
People will generate a story of why you are doing what you are doing, regardless of the reasoning. Maybe there are some perceived regrets or resentments others might assume influenced the decision.
In my situation, I shared that this move was the right one at this point in my life. Overall people understood and were supportive. We also mutually expressed some sadness that we couldn’t work together anymore.
Keeping the explanation for the decision brief helps to keep the conversations focused on the the present and the future, while avoiding litigating the past.
Question for you: How can you ensure a difficult decision is centered on the future and downplays any negative experiences from the past?
To summarize a process for making difficult decisions:
When we see and assess current reality, we can come to accept things as they are.
By understanding our values, what to say “yes” or “no” to becomes easier.
Using models and protocols, we externalize our thinking. They can surface trends and patterns we may not have seen prior because we were conflating the forest with the trees.
Brevity is a virtue.
Found this article useful? Your friends and colleagues might like it too!
Let me know what you found most helpful and/or share a favorite strategy when you have had to make a difficult decision.